Power Rankings: Episode 5 – S5

Iris:

Rapa Nui returns to last place. They finally sought to, and did, settle a third city, which is good for them regardless; however, the last episode found that a Caral navy swarmed their capital and the boozy might of New South Wales bore down on their second city, unfortunately. The Caral attack, although relatively feeble for their capital, is surely doing damage due to mere presence around the city. It may be that their settlement of a third city at long last is a sign that they may be awakening from island stupor, though that possibility is no import to this episode’s ranking, so yes, rank 61 they are.

Dalek:

If you thought Karankawa was doing poorly last episode, you’d’ve been right. Now they’re doing even worse! Every civ nearby seems to be settling close to their borders, and they have almost nowhere left to expand. What’s worse, they’ve decided to squander their potential good options; Instead of sending a settler into the Rockies, where they could make a nice and defensible city, they decided to settle in Yucatan, where another war with Teotihuacan would see the city fall instantly. Speaking of Teotihuacan, Joseph Maria made the inexplicable choice to give away his second city even though it would have been hard to take. Their only saving grace is that Rapa Nui is flunking even harder.

Shaggy:

“We’re not last! We’re not last,” chant the city planners of Ma’in, relishing in their success after convincing Waqah’il Sadiq to implement their plans of doubling Ma’in’s city count in this episode. Quite the audacious plan on their part, settling Nashan in what may be one of the worst settlement spots imaginable and crossing the Red Sea to settle Nashaq a mere mountain tile away from Ethiopia’s capital. But hey, 4 cities are better than 2 any time you start in the Middle East. They also peaced out with Hyksos before settling Nashaq so they have a little bit of time to try and build it up. Despite all that, they’re still in an unenviable position and will need a lot of things to go right for them to crawl their way out of the dumpster tier.

Orange:

Back to 58 because of Rapa Nui falling, but I really doubt Hyksos is ever breaking out of here. A cool religion that will spread throughout Africa because nothing else is there isn’t going to do shit against Ethiopia rolling over in their sleep. And their other borders are uh, Aures and Phoenicia on the run of their life.

But hey, religion watch goes wild for them I guess.

Archimedes :

I’m going to be honest, I’m shocked that Cebu didn’t rise 20 ranks for this episode. They’ve gone and settled the city of Parlan on the Vietnamese coast, a truly game changing spot with silver, diamonds, fish, jungle hills, and with a river to boot. This city is chock full of production, and a wonderful surplus of food to bring their population up to sizable levels, being able to work both those powerful production tiles and the coastal tiles where they can build their unique improvement. That same unique improvement will let them gain extra food from their coastal tiles, as well as gold when trading with foreign powers. All of that food and gold pairs perfectly together with their religious belief, giving a -20% gold discount on buying new tiles, so they can spread their borders and give those plentiful citizens places to work. Frankly, this settlement is one of the strongest moves Cebu could have made in this game.

Now, with all the sarcasm out of the way, Cebu is looking rough. Low production, low military, low cities, low hopes, low dreams. It seems that Cebu is content with the slow and easy way in this game, sitting at 32 happiness in surplus. If they bothered to make any settlers and broadened their empire, maybe they could be competitive, but at the moment we’re looking at a sedentary island civ that will end up being fish food for a more powerful Lanfang, Tang, Bunuba or Japan.

Archimedes :

Sumer continues to be at war with 8, yes that’s right, 8 other civilizations. And for what? Having a Sumerian Wife? A succulent Sumerian Wife? This is Democracy Manifest, I’m telling you!

Sumer continues to sit at 3 cities in the fertile Tigris-Euphrates river delta, with an absolutely MASSIVE 18 population capital. Unfortunately for them, that’s about all they’re doing, which is honestly to be expected. Throughout every test, we’ve seen Sumer fumble around, settling here and there, and ultimately becoming a rump state after around 10 or 20 episode amounts of turns. This run is no different, and it seems ultimately destined in the stars, as Sumer just seems to not have the AI to properly fight their neighbours. Losing the frankly laughable settlement of Eridu, and letting Phoenicia settle in their northern mountains, seem like the final two nails in the coffin of mediocrity. Not even their unique temple replacement, the Ziggurat, with a measly science specialist slot, can help them recover in this game.

ECH:

In a sensible and moral world, Geiju would already be Pegu’s and Sawbu would be marching out of it to take the rest of Yunannese Vietnam. We seem to not live in that world, and expectations are so low now that even with the same advantages as last time I wouldn’t say we power rankers feel certain she’ll conquer the city this time, even though she should. So, if we have such lowly thoughts on Pegu, why a rise at all? Sentiment that they can nab the city may be one aspect, but another I’d highlight is their construction of the Gate of the Sun, an incredibly powerful wonder that boosts lake tiles but even more vitally provides +15% growth in all cities, put to greatest effect last season with Wahgi’s growth explosion after building it. We do not think Pegu is Wahgi… but we do think they can be moderately tall and persist through that strength for a little while.

Archimedes :

I think it’s safe to say that Ternate has yet to have a good episode yet this season of the CBRX. The two most notable things that they have done are get attacked by Lanfang, and get attacked by Cebu. They’ve even arguably been outsettled by Rapa Nui of all civs, who dropped a sneaky little settlement on the eastern side of Papua New Guinea. It’s pretty safe to say that Ternate will stall out, stumble, and eventually be folded into one of the more powerful Oceanic Empires sometime in the coming episodes.

But it’s not a surefire bet. We’ve seen Indonesian focused civs break out of their chains before. Famously Timor Leste languished for the start of their game before becoming a monster of a civ. Ternate has managed to defend not one but two wars of aggression against them. It’s perhaps a bit too early to completely count them out of this game, and they even have a respectable amount of techs currently researched, but that lead they used to have is slowly slipping away to other, frankly closer civilizations. It’ll only be a short while before Bunuba remembers that the world isn’t just New South Wales and decides to take a quick trip north with some triremes and galleases.

JDT:

Long Yun isn’t here for a good time or a long time. He has, mostly of his own volition, completely hemmed himself in the mountains with nothing to live for. Tang has completely outscaled him and is only keeping him alive due to how big of a hassle attacking into the mountains is. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a civ just give up and decide actually they don’t want to play the game. They had everything set up for them to be a very solid mid tier until Slide 68. But now all that's left is for him to die within his cradle of regrets. At least he’s less inactive than Pegu, their eternal enemy with benefits.

Msurdej:  

Don't let the war with Aures fool you, Zazzau is (relatively) safe. Despite the large army of Aures, most of it is nowhere near Kajuru, Amina’s nearest city. And most of the land around that city is covered in forests, making it harder for a successful invasion to occur. Now, could Amina give up a city to one of the top civs in the game? Absolutely. But if Zazzau loses a city, it probably won't be from combat with Aures.

Orange:

Well QK’s fellow “Central Asian Trio of Mistakes” are fighting again, maybe they can somehow get something out of this by taking advantage of the war. They have an okay army, but they have utter shit everything else, especially production. But hey, they have three settlers, so maybe they can come back from this! Oh those settlers haven’t like moved at all lately? Weird. Anyways classic Central Asian Trio of Mistakes.

Lasqueto:

Oh Xaragua. My sweet child. Some people might rag on you for barely playing the game, but I’m proud of you. You’re doing your best, really. You even tried declaring war! You sent, oh, it must have been… three whole triremes! That’s a lot of boats! I’m sure that Spearthrower Owl was very scared. I’m sure he won’t demand a city in the peacedeal. Because your military is a quarter the size of his. No, lovely, you did great! You tried your best, and that’s all that matters.

Sorry hahaha I can’t even pretend anymore come on Xaragua you can do better than this lmaooo

Dalek:

When the slides show Pomo or Teotihuacan, Ponca looks well-positioned for success. You see fairly large cities off to the side and a huge military. Then you look at Ponca’s core. They have three cities, and while they have a decent carpet, that carpet is only covering three cities. Their best shot is definitely attacking Anishinaabe, but apart from that their path to success is long and hard… that’s what she said.

Archimedes :

Ryukyu is frankly in a holding pattern at this point. After bungling their war with Japan, they settled one of the farthest possible cities they could- right at the doorstep of a hungry Lanfang, mind you- and have just been puttering around in their little sea island resort with nothing to do. They look remarkably similar to their next door neighbour Cebu, who have similarly done nothing with their time for these first 5 episodes. And they don’t have a lot of potential momentum either. Looking at their abilities, besides a bit of great people generation, their best bet in getting back into this game is their unique privateer replacement, which happens to get some gold stealing and great scientist generation. It’s really not much in the way of potential, more of a tool to boost an already flourishing and developed empire. With the mighty Tang directly at their doorstep, and a naval Japan that’s already proved their mettle against poor little Ryukyu, it’s looking like only a matter of time before they’re washed off the map. Their one hope and dream is to stay scientifically relevant in this game, but even that advantage is starting to slip away.

NopeCopter:

The Guaycuru have woken up, and against all odds, they’ve even managed to squeeze another couple of cities onto the map! …Too bad one of those cities is located directly in the Chono heartland. On the one hand, hey, maybe it’ll sabotage them. On the other hand, it’s impossible to defend, and the Chono are already starting to match the Guaycuru in military strength even if they did want to fight a war. The Guaycuru were too focused on fulfilling their destiny of immediately killing the Xavante, and now that that’s failed, they’ve been left with a mediocre empire surrounded by much greater powers.

Cloudy:

The cheese market has entered correction territory as the Mozzarella Pope falls 10 places on account of his failure to do something, anything, at all. The space to settle in Europe is almost gone and he’ll have missed his second boat in a row (the first being a religion). The only bright spot is that according to the exclusive view we got during the PRcast (soon to be uploaded to youtube, check it out if you missed it!), they’re about to settle a city in Calabria. But that’s too little too late. It would take a miracle for them to break out of Italy now. See, this is what happens when you eat too much cheese.

ECH:

The upsides: After a pretty embarrassing defeat last episode, Harekr has seemingly realised he might actually have to settle instead of just conquering; and to this end has already plopped down two White Sea cities. Alongside this, the unknown tribe of the north have built an army back up to decent strength quite quickly, an important trait to display as a civ throughout every season.

The downsides: They have another embarrassing defeat scheduled for next episode.

NopeCopter:

Wallachia takes a massive tumble as a crushing reality sets in: they are broke as hell. They are in the kind of debt that would make the Wahgi go “not bad, kid”, and that is not a good thing. Their Science is grinding to a halt, and their only good stat is their military, which isn’t even that useful because their Happiness is on the verge of going negative.Their Production is okay, I guess, but their city count isn’t anything special compared to the rest of Europe anymore, and that’s all they really had going. At this point they need to fight a war as soon as possible, not to expand and break out of a cramped position but just to kill off some of their units and bring their expenses down.

ItsTruckMonth:Demetrius finds himself in quite a pickle. On one hand, he’s teamed up with Vyatka to squeeze the Kipchaks, hopefully out of a couple of cities. On the other hand, he’s done this while having been lightly dragged into a war with Pakistan, and now he’s on the verge of losing his fresh Caspian settlement to the Kipchaks.

Maybe we start with baby steps, eh, Demetrius?

NopeCopter:

The Itelmen managed to bravely fend off Green Ukraine and Japan last episode, but unfortunately, the PRs seem to mostly agree that this won’t last until the next episode. Both Avacha and Chineshisheliu are in serious danger with a lot of enemy units still around and not a whole lot of defenders, and they’re all but guaranteed to at least flip. Losing even one of these cities, let alone both, would really hem the Itelmen in, which would be a rough way to go for such an ambitious civ, but it wouldn’t be all that surprising, either. Beyond this, the Itelmen have abysmal stats for their size (particularly their tech count), and Green Ukraine could be dead in the ground and still probably be a potential threat, so opinions on our Kamchatkan contender have taken a pretty massive tumble. But hey, a dumb enough peace deal could easily save them!

Lasqueto:

Luba is a civ at a crossroads. Their situation is honestly pretty ass right now. Borderline trash tier stats, five cities and not much room for more. However, with this Maravi war they could stand to take their neighbour down a peg or two. Mankhamba looks like a possible grab. Maravi's other cities will probably be trickier targets, and I'm not sure Luba has the momentum or production to make that happen. The terrain isn't in their favour either. Still, this is probably their best and maybe last shot at regaining some relevance.

Of course, the issue with Luba doing well out of this war is that means Herero will likely do even better, and once they finish off Maravi, the only way they can look is north. With that considered, Luba's kinda fucked no matter what happens here.

ECH:

I feel kinda insane, I cannot begin to overstate how truly, truly awful Xavante’s test games went, typically dead by turn 100 having built maybe 3 units at best. Well, here we are. Xavante is an undeniably military leader with an imposing carpet (and one of the game’s strongest economies to upkeep it) stretching across the whole breadth of their lands!!! Sounds great right, why are they still only 40th then? Well, it’s true that their army covers their entire land, but that’s a low bar when you’re sitting on 3 cities and have at best 2 spaces for cities around you left, one of which is being raced to by Guaycuru at the end of the episode. A civ trapped at 3 cities is one with inevitably weak prospects, and no matter how impressive their carpet is, at this stage of the game with the terrain and strength of the neighbours they have, any war just risks depleting their forces for no gain. The mid-tier Caral to their west and city-rich but force-weak Yanomami to their north are the avenues I’d suggest to Apoena if I could, but I fear he might prefer maintaining his jungle army mosh pit instead.

Shaggy:

Maravi are so screwed. Sena and Tete are basically a buffet for Herero and Seychelles to pig out at, the only thing stopping it at the moment is the bulk of Maravi’s army sitting in Maano and the lack of any tangible Seychellois military forces. Ok, so maybe the buffet is set up but everyone is still getting seated and being told the specials. Luba and Ethiopia are also smelling a feast from the parking lot and are trying to angle their way in for a taste. Unfortunately Luba is having trouble fitting through the door and Ethiopia has decided to send one of their kids in to see what the drink specials are before the whole family gets out of the car but the kid decided that the best way to do that was to try and peer in through the window rather than try to navigate the very narrow front door. Maravi are so screwed.

ECH:

Last week we were all rather shocked at Estonia’s performance compared to our expectations, and we thought a 5 rank jump would be a just reward. Well, looks like the rebound was stronger than we thought as Estonia hasn’t slowed down, adding an extra city and, more importantly, jumping from 26 total production at the end of last episode to 54, above many other European contenders! This rise comes at a good time, as key rival Scythia appears fully trapped, so the time for civs to necessarily conquer to expand appears at hand, and Estonia desperately needs improvement to survive it. Their army does need to grow, but their surprisingly robust science (at above average 16 techs) could help there.

NopeCopter:

Pakistan, Pakistan, Pakistan. What is there to say about Pakistan? Not much. They started up a war with the vulnerable Bactria… then immediately made peace. Their stats are painfully average across the board. They have 5 cities, meaning they’re hardly a rump state, but they’re not really looking good, either. That being said, they have achieved one thing: boxing Bactria and Mysore in juuuust enough to kind of screw both of them over. Unless they actually build good enough militaries to invade Pakistan and their fairly indefensible cities, of course. Somehow this is still one of the best Pakistan runs ever seen.

Leman:

Circassia is kind of turning things around after a really bad start with another city settlement south of the Caucasus at the tail end of last episode. There are still a handful of Circassia settlers wandering around the Ukrainian and Russian plains but those are a bit of a wash now. None of them managed to wander down to Anatolia this episode, but hopefully they can. If Circassia can keep this settling pattern up, there might be a path for them yet, with Sumer being trash and Phoenecia’s recent settles being kinda weird.

Leman:

Hansa and Kalmar draw blades, and unfortunately, Hansa’s blade is smaller and duller and just worse. Not in military stats, both Kalmar and Hansa have very few troops, but in the other stats like production and city count. Kalmar is just kind of outgrowing Hansa, and in a longer, drawn out war, where not a lot happens, the bigger civ can often out-attrition the smaller civ. Hansa really probably should peace out here, and settle Germany before France or the Pope get there. And stop getting into stupid wars with civs across the North Sea.

Msurdej:  

As a part of the Anti-Maravi Alliance, Herero has entered into this war with their pants down. Their main army is pretty far away from the easier cities of Maravi to conquer like Tete. Otijkune on the other hand, could fall under siege easily and could even be captured. Even so, Herero does have the advantage of being in an alliance that could take the brunt of Maravi's attention. If Morenga plays his cards right, he might be able to sneak a city off Maravi in this war.

ItsTruckMonth:

Scotland sleeps through this episode as the rest of Europe bursts into flames, especially as their rivals, Umhaill, begin and end an uneventful war with the Hanseatic League. While their stats are pretty decent, they’re starting to run out of room, with their rival sneaking more and more cities onto mainland Britain, and the Kalmar Union beginning to fill out Scandinavia.

Time and room are running out for Mary. Let's see how she handles the pressure.

Cloudy:

Portugal reaches its highest ever rank this week, though still just barely in the bottom half, thanks to a late settling spree. They didn’t have much space left before these new settlements, and they have even less now, but they’re making the most of what’s available, with a precarious city jammed into Morocco, another near Madrid, and a third on the Balearic Islands. And they have more settlers wandering around too, I believe, as we saw on the PRcast. Where will they go? Madeira, the Canaries? We shall see. But I can say that if there’s one thing João isn’t, it’s lazy.

Shaggy:

And why not? Why shouldn’t Togortak take it? Marakanda looks poised to fall swiftly next episode thanks in part to the Kipchak navy condemned to raid around the Caspian Sea. The coalition against them doesn’t seem to be having the effect that the would-be invaders intended. The defense and counterattack against Bactria is humming along and Vyatka’s forces have yet to emerge from their boreal posts. Though they do still need to keep an eye on their neighbors, the Kipchaks are keeping up with them and have been able to outmaneuver them so far.

JDT:

Sometimes your best just isn’t enough. Wassalou by all means had a pretty decent episode. They continued building up their core and settled a bunch of cities around the Maghreb, pumping military and settlers and keeping up on the stat sheet. The problem is the core of their position hasn’t changed. The Aures seem stronger than ever, having locked down the maghreb for themselves and built a decent military, and they still bisect Wassalou’s empire whilst having stronger land. In fact, there's a non-zero possibility they might cut off Wassalou’s new settle in Western Morocco through their expansionism. As a result of these, Wassalou goes down by 30, as the avenue for an easy breakout shrinkens day by day.

Dalek:

Caral is in an interesting spot. Unfortunately for them, Xavante has exceeded expectations by not eating shit, and Yanomami has cut off some potential city locations to the north. Now, maybe they’re considering recreating the success of X3’s Inca… But there’s one problem: a civ is in the Pacific.

No problem, said Qhapac, and Caral is now at war with Rapa Nui, trying to take Anakena. Their effort probably won’t succeed, since the war is being fought entirely by a couple triremes going up against a city with high defense strength and a pantheon bonus of ranged city damage. Perhaps the conquest will be successful much later, when Caral develops a tech advantage, but for now they need to ride it out and not die.

Lasqueto:

Pretty boring episode for Rouran. Their stats still suck. Those units marching east for no obvious reason is the main story. Aside from that uhh, Ket's been pretty aggressively settling in their direction, but Rouran's been settling back, trying to wall them off. Also they have their UU out. Not much else to say.

Orange:

Anishinaabe continues to be, okay, half decent. Like they have got better stats than their cities would suggest I think, but they are not expanding nearly enough as they should be. Pomo are encroaching in the west and being the ones to take the Canadian interior, and Onondaga has now cut them off in the east, but Ponca hasn’t attacked yet which was the biggest danger (one that they will quickly out-scale, every turn Ponca doesn’t attack is another where they fall behind and lose out on any chance of breaking out themselves). So Anishinaabe will probably continue to be okay for a bit longer until they engage in anything and we can see if they will be able to stand tall or fall.

Cloudy:

France is this week’s biggest winner, rising 13 places to enter the top half for the first time ever. This rise is mirrored on the stats sheet, where France climbed 18 places, reaching 19th overall, on account of their robust settling spree and large army, which comes in at 13th on the cylinder. Another city is also likely to be founded soon, just to the east of their current lands, according to images seen during the PRcast. Furthermore, having locked down two of the three choke points in the Pyrenees, they’re in a better position to attack Portugal in the future than would otherwise have been possible. And of course, Scotland’s Dutch settlement would fall very quickly if France decided they wanted it. The only question is, where will France go from here? Will they find a way to enhance their position militarily? Or will they stagnate like so many early European powers before them?

Archimedes :

There are a lot of “What Ifs” going around when talking about Onondaga. “What if they settle Quebec.” “What if they conquer Susquehannock.” “What if they make it to Greenland.” And I think that describes Onondaga’s performance quite well so far in this game. They do have an army, and really that’s the only thing that’s keeping them afloat in the eyes of the Power Ranker team. But a lot of speculation has been had about them invading Susquehannock, and frankly I don’t see it. The territory between the two is mountainous and unforgiving, with no easy routes or juicy picks for an invasion. Their army as well is mainly made up of horsemen, which could be great for taking down units but would be hard pressed to deal with actually capturing cities. Anishinaabe to their west could be an easier target, but the great lakes in the way even makes them as an invasion route a prickly pear to pick through.

Otherwise though, Onondaga looks quite iffy at the moment. Negative 3 happiness and only 4 policies picked up leave them at the absolute bottom of the barrel when it comes to happiness and culture, and their religious beliefs seem to trend towards ‘win more’ abilities, and frankly they aren’t winning enough to take advantage of them. I’ll give them credit, they do have at least some production, and with both Monuments to the Gods and Temple Mayor picked up, they could have the chance to pick up some wonders easily with their cumulative 35% bonus production. That will likely be the only thing to keep them in this game, as otherwise they look primed and ready to slowly waste away and become a juicy target for one of their more capable neighbours. Potentially we’ll even see Umhaill take a little hop skip and jump across the pond to find themselves a New Found Land.

ItsTruckMonth:

Despite being bogged down in a war with their much weaker neighbor in Sumer, the Phoenicians have had quite a quiet episode, the main highlight being a fairly ballsy settlement in the middle of open Persia (right on the doorstep of said neighbor they’re warring with).

All in all, though, they’re in a pretty nice spot. Lots of shitter civs to munch on in the form of Hyksos, Sumer, and Ma’in, and their biggest threat at the moment, Wallachia, will have to deal with funneling units through the Bosphorus (plus they’re broke lmao). The Phoenicians may want to get their beakers up though, given some mediocre science and tech counts.

ECH:

In my estimation, Green Ukraine has one of the widest gaps between ranker placements and ranker vibes of this entire season so far. Put less formally, the consensus is that they suck, no grit or momentum or heart or the like, but that their objective potential and test game strength makes it impossible to drop them too far too fast. But make no mistake, at their current trajectory they are going to drop hard. Taking a city and settling a new city next episode could mitigate things, but they need a new spring in their step if they want to catch up to their elusive potential, especially if Japan also captures a city or Ket (or even bloody Rouran) settle more land we once assumed was Hlushko’s for the taking.

Reformer:

Hip hurrah! The bloody conflict between Caral soldiers and Yanomami jungles has come to an end! Hip hip hurrah! You might ask, now what. What does Yanomami do now? Great question. How many spots can they settle at this point? Can’t be more than a handful. Then, I suppose, they have to start fighting. I don’t recommend trying to fight Teotihuacan. Xaragua could be an option, though Yanomami does have only three ports on the Atlantic coast at the moment. Caral is clearly at least on par, and doesn’t look like they’re trending downward. Xavante, on the other hand, is STILL on three cities. Their stats are okay at the moment, and they are exceptionally militaristic, but three cities is insufficient to maintain pace. Eventually, Xavante will make for a good target. If someone else doesn’t swoop them up first. From there, maybe Yanomami could challenge Potiguara, Caral, or Guaycuru. I don’t see it happening any time soon…such are the fates of the Amazonian civs.

JDT:

Umhaill settled a new city in Western Scotland in Carrickkildavnet, further establishing their hold over the western half of the isles and punishing Scotland for literally doing nothing for the past 3 episodes. They also went ahead and had a very abortive war with the Hansa that gave nothing of value apart from perhaps killing one of Hansa’s settlers. Notably though, they seem to have a good navy and military lined up around the world, and a settler going north. Could they be setting themselves up to settle Greenland, giving a strong production base to move on eastwards? That certainly would be the smart play anyways.

Orange:

The rage I felt when Scythia peaced out *right* before they took that Vyatkan city. They’ve been penned in so much and they flubbed it right before they had their breakaway. Maaaaan. Still got a big army though maybe they can point it at Estonia, Circassia already, or even broke as fuck Wallachia.

JDT:

Bangladesh moves towards establishing themselves as a major regional power by continuing to settle down their neck of the woods. New cities have been springing up across Tibet and eastern India en masse, bolstering an incredibly solid core that looks pretty resilient to assaults from all their neighbours. Their statlines are still good, the mountains are still good, all looks poised for them to grow into a very solid regional power with the potential to break out.

…wait they fell 4 places? What could’ve caused that? Checks info sheet Oh that's why.

Yeah Bangladesh is at war with Tang. In theory this war should go nowhere because the only communal border is through the terrain hell of the Himalayas. However, we all know that Tang’s diplomats are hypnotists, and Tang still has an erstwhile stats advantage over Bangladesh. So don’t be surprised if a small 1 pop city changes hands.

Reformer:

Alright, so, we’re fighting a two-front war. I don’t think there’s cause for concern, though. Bjarmia, though in possession of a large army, has failed easier offensives against weaker foes. Could still go poorly for Kalmar, but I don’t expect it. Hansa to the south is even less intimidating. Many turns of warfare have amounted to nothing. Kalmar’s composite bowmen defend the Baltic Sea approach with ease. It comes down to how much grit Kalmar has. It won’t even take that much, but this is a true test of spirit. If Kalmar weathers the storm, they are set for the early game. Failure means countless struggles– an emboldened Bjarmia, a Hansa across the sea unable to be defeated…the troubles would be many. This must not end in tragedy.

ItsTruckMonth:

Susquehannock and Onondaga are essentially locked in a Cold War that could determine the fate of North America, and to say they’re dead even is an understatement. Looking at the stats, they’re very close:

Military: Onondaga (2147 vs 1756)

Production: Susq (66 vs 62)

Cities: Susq (7 vs 6)

Techs + Science: Onondaga (16 (53) vs 14 (43))

Susquehannock overall has a slight lead in stats, but it's a nailbiter. Not only that, but both sides are starting to run out of room to expand on the mainland. While there are some lesser powers Susquehannock can munch on in the meantime, like Karankawa, these two powers are going to go after each other at one point. When that time comes, get your popcorn and/or beers ready: it’s gonna be a doozy.

Shaggy:

Potiguara did pretty much nothing but keep pace in this episode. They have more settlers than they know what to do with as South America hits the ossification point where settling options grow few and far between but before wars across the Amazon become viable with higher tier units and tree chopping. Either they’ll try to backfill in settles or they’ll find some islands to stick them on. At least their production is insane as they boast the best production per city of any of the top 15 producing civs this episode. Keep up the good work, the shrimp is delicious.

Archimedes :

Ket continues their streak of staying within the top 15 by doing… let me just check my notes… not much actually. They have a wide empire of snow and tundra cities and, would you look at that, have dared to settle Kangatovo outside of their taiga sphere. They look solid, if sleepy, but don’t let those cute fluffy fox tails deceive you. They are set up incredibly well for a defensive war if one of their more militarized neighbours decides they want a piece of the tundra pie.

Ket first and foremost are set to take advantage of any supplies enemy troops bring into their lands. Their UA grants them food for every unit killed in their territory, allowing for potentially explosive growth in a defensive engagement. They also happen to damage enemies when growing their borders, and they have their Archer replacement, the Fish-Oil Bowman, online, which. while only being an archer, stays competitive by inflicting ‘poison’ on an enemy unit, causing them to take half their hp after moving. They also picked up an incredible belief a while back, Guardian Spirits, that gives each of their cities +1 defense for each city following their religion. That amounts to a whopping +2 defense right now, but could easily snowball into +20 or +30 as they spread their religion in the vast and uncompetitive steppes. Finally, their missionaries grant +10% combat strength to adjacent units, to top everything off. Talk about a vast suite of bonuses.

Ket are geared toward a long game at the moment, and any of their neighbours considering a frontal assault should do it quickly before this Loon of the North decides it’s time to take flight and feast on their flock. It won’t be long until Ket really starts to snowball out of control, and be the indefensible stronghold Yunnan wishes it could be.

Msurdej:  

Mysore doesn't simply have a strong military. It has THE strongest military on the cylinder. And what is it doing with the world's mightiest military? Well it's... settling a city in the middle of the desert north of them. And fighting a bloody- oh wait, boring war with Sumer. Even with that strong military, a lot of it is chariots, which aren't great at sieging cities. Mysore is going to have to win some fights, and either take cities or get crafty in diplomacy if they want to win.

Lasqueto:

Japan just can't stop winning. Right off the back of that nothingburger invasion from Ryukyu, they immediately looked north, jumping into the war against Itelmen. Chi-... Chin-... that Itelmen city looks like it'll fall early next episode, barring acts of god or whatever. Would give them an even stronger foothold on the mainland, potentially letting them cut off Grukraine. Speaking of, Japan cucked them out of a city in Korea too. Their one weak spot is definitely their military, but since they're doing a pretty great job concentrating it up north where it matters, that's not as much of an issue. Overall, Japan looks set to become a dominant force in the north Pacific, so long as Tang doesn't go naval.

Now if only they'd settle Northern Honshu...

Archimedes :

Honestly? Lanfang is doing pretty alright. Sitting at a solid six cities with one on the mainland and a settler prepared to settle another, Lanfang has been quietly puttering away working on their empire. Still at war with Ternate, they didn’t make any huge moves or waves but also didn’t waste too much production, unlike the production they wasted on a government wonder that, in the specific modlists used for the CBRX5, is ultimately a cosmetic bonus rather than a mechanical one. A bit of a shame really.

With top science however, and a unique ability that lets Lanfang build mines on flat land and land with jungle or forest, Lanfang is managing to stay high up on the stat rankings, which is more that can be said for their floundering neighbours. It’s worth noting that Lanfang also has a unique ability centered around working their mines, as the first time each city works four mines in their radius, they get to open a free social policy branch. There are at least three cities that have four mines improved, and a few more cities that are nearing that four mine threshold, so it’s a safe bet to say that Lanfang at this point has opened Tradition, Liberty, Honour AND Piety, mostly for free.

Lanfang has the chance to take advantage of their weak neighbours, as all of Pegu, Ryukyu, Ternate and Cebu have been fairly sleepy and left land open and available for settlements. As their science continues to top the charts, advanced naval units will begin to be unlocked, allowing Lanfang to make some strong and decisive city captures. Their only looming threat of course is Bunuba, another fairly coastal civ that has sky high science and a strong production base. As long as Bunuba stays focused on New South Wales, Lanfang will likely be able to continue prospering, but the moment these two juggernauts face each other, one will end up bowing down to the other.

Shaggy:

Despite not being able to take Ur earlier in their war with Sumer, the Seychelles manage to capture Eridu instead. The Sumerian army looks battered and does not seem up to the task of recapturing Eridu. The capture, however, is not without a toll as the Seychelles now have one of the smallest remaining militaries on the cylinder at the end of the episode. Granted, part of that is Maravi’s doing as they bang their heads against the Seychellois cities along the Somali coast, but that’s a war the Seychelles themselves started so they really only have themselves to blame. Also they’ve adopted the now-common strategy of sending a settler to the frontline in the middle of a war. I believe it can technically settle in place and although the episode ended in the middle of turn 90 we have gotten confirmation on the PRCast that it successfully survived the turn. It would be one hell of a thorn in Maravi’s side. In all honesty I put the Seychelles in the top 10 this week, I don’t think they have much to worry about given that none of their neighbors seem to be able to take advantage of their dearth of units at the moment.

Archimedes :

As the most vocal of the Teotihuacan supporters on the Power Ranker team, I’m here to tell you that this was a doozy of an episode for our favourite Mesoamerican representative. And by favourite, I mean completely split opinions even amongst ourselves, let alone the wider audience. It was debated heavily whether Teotihuacan would get a higher spot this ranking, but ended up being a modest climb from their rank in episode 4. And I’m here to tell you why their rank should be higher.

First off, getting the peace deal city off of Karankawa was one of the most insurmountable obstacles cleared off of Teo’s plate. The mountain pass, lake, rough terrain, and bombarding ranged units made any assault on the city of Cujane a veritable meat grinder. With Teotihuacan picking up this city with arguably some losses, and not even a dip in population, opens the door to flooding into the North American plains with a vengeance. Karancahua is now a ripe plum of a target for Teotihuacan to nab, and with the capital secured leads to eventual conquests of Ponca, and potentially Susquehannock territory. Mountainous and hilly terrain is always a challenge for civilizations’ AI, and clearing that out of the way is a huge boon to the possibilities of successful war in the future.

Of course, then there was the Panama Canal settlement. Defining the current far reaches of Teotihuacan’s range, the settlement of Cholula not only makes a great hot sauce, but also acts as a solid bulwark against any further Caral or Yanomami incursions, likely requiring a unified effort of a land assault assisted with naval forces to take. With the AI being not the greatest at coordinating their units, Cholula stands as a likely bastion to stop either civ from properly invading into Central America. It also enables Teotihuacan to maneuver their naval forces between their eastern and western sides of the empire, and could be the deciding factor to a proper Xaragua conquest. With such a sleepy Caribbean civ right on their doorstep, Teo can likely pop in and pick up some free cities in the near or distant future, as long as Yanomami or Susquehannock don’t get there first. Xaragua being at war with Teo and absolutely floundering their invasion so far means we might even get the chance to see another city trade happen in the next episode, with Xaragua giving away a stepping stone for Teo’s full takeover of these Caribbean islands. A power ranker can dream.

Now, there have been some valid detractions noted for Teotihuacan and it would be disingenuous for me not to mention them. Their close neighbour Pomo is neck and neck in stats at the moment, and has a lot of defensive potential with the Rockies protecting them, as well as their northern expansion options still being open due to Tlingit’s aversion to inland settlements. Pomo will likely be a thorn in Teotihuacan’s side for the vast majority of this season, and is one of the reasons Teotihuacan has been rated lower by some. Teotihuacan has also generally run out of settling room, and as noted it historically has been difficult for past civs to break out of the Central American region. Teotihuacan hasn’t yet fully developed their lands either, which could also be seen as a source of growth or potential, as they have a unique Caravansary building that both gives them a source of Obsidian luxury resource, as well as spawns builder units when trade routes complete in the city. Teotihuacan already has a few trade routes going between neighbours, and could start pumping out extra builders to properly develop their lands soon. And they have yet to build a wonder yet, something they have a unique ability to help with, a bias in their AI to prioritize, and abilities and a religion that benefit from. While Teotihuacan has definitely made some progress to being the top dog in the Americas, it’s undeniable that they still have yet to reach the podium, and we can only hope (or hope against for all the haters) that Teotihuacan continues to make smart moves in the next few episodes.

Leman

Vyatka looked like they were dangerously close to overextending this week. They settled a trio of new cities, but completely neglected their defense against Scythia. As such, Scythia almost managed to snap up Slobodsky. The only reason Vyatka still is holding onto that city is a very well timed peace treaty. Vyatka’s out here bolstering their defenses (and then throwing that defense at Kipchaks), but that trick is probably only going to work once, and only while tech is low. I don’t think Vyatka’s gonna get bailed out again, so let’s hope they build up a military presence this time.

Iris:

Ethiopia slides a couple ranks by virtue of little more than a very uneventful episode for them; they moved a settler who did not settle yet; they declared an impossible war against Herero; they made peace with Zazzau without any gains; their capital seems to be somewhat static; and right at the end of the episode, they are the last to join in on the Maravi hate train, and there is not much optimism about their chances to actually benefit from the war. We shall see what happens. For the time being, they are in a positive position so perhaps they ponder that it probably does not matter too much to have a sleepy episode.

Cloudy:

Pomo jumps back up a couple ranks this week thanks to their excellent settling pattern, which has opened up much of interior Canada for them. Having broken through the Ponca-Tlingit gap, and with Tlingit only settling the coasts, Pomo has a great opportunity to fill in the empty inland space, to become the Bosnia to Tlingit’s Croatia, as we put it on the recent PRcast. That was an opportunity that usually fell to Ponca in the test runs, but will now belong to Pomo, probably.

And of course I would be remiss not to mention their war against the Tlingit, which has resulted in some population loss for Pomo, but nothing they won’t recover from, and with their current tech level Tlingit are still unable to take Behe’pal.

Msurdej:  

The northern Australian civ ends its war with NSW, with the borders unchanged from when it started. Bunuba is watching as Rapa Nui gets its city on the subcontinent removed by NSW, but probably won't do much to stop them. Instead, this Power Ranker thinks they should focus north. Ternate is weak, and if Jandamarra can make an Armada and claim the seas, he can slowly build up an empire to hopefully get on the mainland and then finish off NSW for good.

Leman:

Well, New South Wales decided they hated fun today and have decided to assimilate that weird city Rapa Nui settled in Australia. And it looks like Hanga Roa is about to fall in a couple turns, because New South Wales is a monstrous Australian powerhouse and Rapa Nui has no idea where they are. Solid move from NSW, and hopefully they move on to Hanga Piko on Papua New Guinea next. They’ll need all the cities they can get because while Rapa Nui is ass, Bunuba is not.

Reformer:

Tlingit continues to wage a fairly fruitless war against Pomo, this ep. In Tlingit’s defense, they are at least on the offensive. But it’s still a waste if you get nothing out of it. Seems a bit of waste is no problem for Tlingit, though. They maintain high-tier, top10 stats, a good position, and a desire to continue settling. Now, admittedly, the exact settling pattern remains a little…funny, but we can forgive such quirks. Eventually there’ll be no more coastal spots to settle! And then you’ll see. You’ll see an inland Tlingit city. Crazy I know. In the meantime, enjoy the funny settling.

Reformer:

Oh fancy seeing you again. Let me tell you about Chono. Hm. Let me check my notes. Chono didn’t settle any new cities this ep. They’re very close to placing a city down in uhhhh. Fucking. Papua. I guess. Meanwhile Guaycuru settles smack dab in the middle of Chono’s core. Let’s be real. That city is as good as gone. Guaycuru is falling behind fast (though they did recover statistically a fair bit this ep). Chono remains immense. The Pampas are ripe for conquest once Chono builds a land military. From there, Chono is set to dominate both at land and at sea. No one nearby can really compete– not yet, anyway. Potiguara is showing promise, and is in a region that often delivers results. Still, I argue South America is Chono’s oyster.

Archimedes :

Aures continues to top the stats this episode as a powerhouse in the north and West African area. With top production out of all the competition, and almost top population, it would figure that Aures has a real shot at the glory of a CBRX victory. The only issue? Ethiopia .

Aures’ land is good, but fairly indefensible. Lots of flat land in their south and eastern territories and generally open invasion routes mean their house of cards can tumble. And what has their most defensible neighbour picked up? A little wonder called the Statue of Zeus. With +15% strength against cities, Ethiopia could make a huge dent in Aures’ city count, crippling the stats they’ve built up over the past 5 episodes. That is, of course, if Ethiopia can manage to wade through Aures and their carpet of units. And the newly fielded Zentana Rider is an additional hiccup in whoever might want to invade Aures. Their unique granary provides a bit of extra defense to cities as well, making an invasion certainly possible but a bit harder. If Aures could manage to finish off Wassoulou and Zazzau, their position as the eminent Saharan power could crystallize into a permanent spot in the top contenders for the rest of this season.

Archimedes :

Ho boy, there’s a reason why Tang has been taking top spots recently, and that’s because their empire is looking stacked. It’s solid, it’s cracked, it’s built different. 12 cities is absolutely nothing to sneeze at, especially when you get two of them for free, established and everything. Top population and top food yield is also an incredible chart to be topping, and only 8 production off from the production leader means Tang is solidly established and ready to make their mark. And while their military is not the highest at the moment, you’ve seen last episode exactly what they can do with that military when they put their mind to it. And by that, I mean they can have their military sit around and do nothing while other civilizations give them cities for free.

Speaking of those cities, Tang additionally benefits from occupied cities. Their Unique Ability gives +1 science generated from courthouse, and their Unique Unit archer specifically gives additional growth when garrisoned in occupied cities. Tang has at this point turned their city gifts into occupied cities, and so is probably benefitting off of that additional food. As well, they picked up a nice wonder in the Hanging Gardens, not an incredible one to have but overall beneficial. Tang, in the food focused Chinese basin, is looking more and more able to grow into a massive empire.

And while their empire growth and production is impressive, frankly it’s Tang’s neighbours that are giving them the greatest benefit. Nobody in Tang’s immediate vicinity is looking particularly powerful, with Rouran, Yunnan, and Ryukyu looking to be fairly soft targets. Japan, Lanfang, and Green Ukraine as well look all right, but haven’t made any big moves so far, sitting in the medium category that Tang could eventually take advantage of. With an incredible standing empire and a beneficial geopolitical landscape, Tang really earns its top ranking spot as of now. It’s only a matter of time to see if they push through and conquer the whole region, or flounder and let their distant neighbours gobble up their weaker neighbours.